Tuesday, April 20, 2010

The perils of exercise

Yesterday, I went for my regular powerwalk around the neighborhood (I do this at least three times a week, sometimes as many as six.) You'd be amazed at how complicated a simple walk can be. Here are a few of my observations:

1. If you have a dog, leash him. I don't care if he's 5 pounds or 85 pounds (well, I care a little) - I have no desire to be bitten, jumped on, slobbered on or harassed by dogs of any weight. Also, when your dog does run after me, GRAB HIM. Don't just watch. I know where you live. Just saying.

2. If you don't have the common courtesy to watch where you're shooting baskets and you hit me with the ball as I walk by, I feel like it's up to me whether I A. kick the ball across the street, B. take the ball home with me or C. return it to you. (Safe money's not on C.)

3. If you're a duck and you choose to yell at me, prepare to be laughed at. Not because I don't take you seriously, but dude, you're a duck. It's funny.

4. In the name of all that's holy, stop parking your car across the sidewalk. It's a side walk, not an extension of your driveway. That big space in front of your garage? That's where the car goes. Figure it out.

5. If you say hi to me and I don't say hi back, it's not because I'm ignoring you, it's because those things in my ears connected to that little rectangle on my hip? They're blasting music into my head. I CAN'T HEAR YOU.

I don't know about you, but I feel better now.


  1. LOL Sounds like quite the exciting walk!!:) Dogs--they bother me the most.

  2. Rant away and I totally agree on all points.

  3. Lol! I walk my dog (on a leash) but I'm VERY conscious of other walkers and give them wide berth. As a dog walker it annoys me when I'll hold my dog so someone w/ kids can pass (if there's not room to cross the street or whatever) and they'll stop w/ their kids to 'play' w/ my dog.

  4. Whew! Glad you got that off your chest.

    The duck one has me in stitches!

  5. I agree.
    Myself and my dogger (not el Wombat) were attacked by 3 pittbulls on a neighborhood walk. I carry mace with me now, and I use it if I feel threatened. I don't care how big or small your dog is, I freak out either way.
    Wombat is nowhere near the tough dog BuddyDawg was.

  6. I really wish I had seen the duck quacking at you.