Wednesday, March 12, 2008

I Am Not A High-Priced Hooker

The hits on my blog lately have been off the charts. At first, I couldn't figure it out, but now I know why. It's all you gossip mongers looking for the call girl known as Kristen who's involved in this whole governor of New York scandal.

I'll be perfectly honest. I had never even heard of Spitzer or Spritzer or Zitzer or sleezebag or whatever his name is until this whole thing happened.

Now that you're here and you know I'm not that Kristen, that I'm not the high price hooker you're looking for (nor have I ever been - sorry to disappoint), why don't you do something more worthwhile with your time than endless googling about a story that has already gotten way too much coverage. Go read a book. Or read a book to a kid. Or better yet, donate some money so a bunch of kids can get some books of their very own. Seriously. You know it's the right thing to do.

Then take a shower. You're starting to smell.

21 comments:

  1. um, at least your biggest google draw isn't the phrase "licking nipples".

    I win.

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  2. OMG Kristen... you are truly priceless!

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  3. You cracked me up so bad that even in my sleep deprived state I had to say "Bravo".. at least you could have pimped my book THE LOTUS BLOSSOM CHRONICLES. If those folks want dirty, scandalous and then some...I would be the sales boost I need on Amazon. LOL

    Alright, alright, I am going to bed after a week of deadlines!

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  4. Shoot. I totally thought I'd found that hooker in the scandal. But a romance novelist? You'll do.

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  5. Oops, left a comment for this on yesterday's post. D'oh.

    Look on the bright side, though. Maybe some of the people coming here for that Kristen will buy your books.

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  6. Well I, for one, am disappointed. I had that whole cheap thrill thing goin' on...

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  7. Hahahahhaha! That certainly boosts your celebrity status. Think that if half of these people stay and be readers what you can do: 1) Brainwash them 2) Take over the World.

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  8. Anonymous5:36 AM

    LOL, OMG, Kristen. That was too good. I hope those idiots take your advice.

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  9. Lady, you're hilarious. I love it.

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  10. *spews tea onto keyboard* Kristen, you're just priceless....

    Hope you have a fantastic day!

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  11. I'm just here for the books!! I swear it!

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  12. What? Wait. You're not that Kristen? Um, Sorry, I won't be bothing you again, Ma'am. teehee.

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  13. OMG, thanks for the inspiration for a blog. ::g::

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  14. Anonymous9:35 AM

    Well, traffic might decrease. They gave her real name and showed her myspace page on the news this morning.

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  15. Don't sell yourself short, K-bear. You could seduce a governor, if you wanted. Pas de problem!

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  16. Great post Kristen!

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  17. teehee.. must admit that i googled KRISTEN to learn more about her, and i got you! well....

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  18. Anonymous8:35 PM

    Yes, it is annoying being accused of being a hooker. I get that all the time. IDK how

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